A Message for Women of a ‘Certain Size’
| First you’ll hear that voice – that warm smoky growl with the slightly nasal touch. Then you’ll recognize sultry star Ashlie Atkinson from her memorable roles in F/X’s “Rescue Me” and in Off-Broadway’s “Fat Pig.” If you can’t quite place the face, then surely you’ve heard stories about Margaret Thrasher, Ashlie’s action-packed alter ego. She’s hell on wheels, dressed in fierce fishnets, the fastest girl in five boroughs. Margaret is a key member of the Gotham Girls Roller Derby, and she just finished her first season. Seriously. Margaret – I mean, Ashlie -- says, “It is the most incredible thing to come into my life besides a person. The last thing I wanted was forty more girlfriends and to join a sport. But something about the derby hit something vital in me. It opened up another place where I could live in my body instead of my neck up. I always strut when I leave.”
It’s no coincidence that Ashlie’s acting career took off when she put on the skates. “The moment I found something that made me feel as involved and as positive as acting, my acting career took off.” |
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Ashlie grew up sweet, sharp, and talented as a “girl from Little Rock.” Her parents were very supportive of their outgoing little diva, but worried about her too – especially her dreams of performing. “I was chubby and way too smart for my age, which is hard enough to be, let alone that kid on TV. I was on diets for probably eight or ten years.” Was that because of parental pressure, or was it Ashlie’s choice? “My parents and I get along famously. I feel very lucky. I realize the reason I was on diets was because they saw how I was affected by the cruelty of kids…they thought it would be easier for me [to be thin]. It stopped because we all sort of realized together that I was fine. I was outgoing, I had friends, and I was okay. They didn’t have to protect me.”
At 17 she moved to New York City hoping that she had killed the acting bug…but…she ended up getting kicked out of Barnard after a year and half. “I had a very hard time in New York because I saw all these things I wanted to be involved with. Then I would go home and study poli sci and religion, my double major.” Heart won out over head, and Ashlie started to audition again.
Now 28, Ashlie’s become the poster girl for strong, sexy, confident women of a certain size. On “Rescue Me,” she bedded a hot fireman and then dumped him because he wasn’t smart enough. She plays a tough cop in Spike Lee’s newest film, “Inside Man.” And in her breakthrough role in Neil LaBute’s controversial off-Broadway play, “Fat Pig,” she exemplified the battle between societal pressure and self-acceptance as a fat woman who falls in love with a very insecure man.
“I didn’t understand how big ‘Fat Pig’ was gonna be. When I first heard the title, I was like, ooookay, well, this is lovely! But then I read the breakup scene. I was embarrassed at first because of the moment when the strong woman says, ‘I’ll do it for you…I’ll lose the weight for you…’ I understood that feeling so clearly.”
The irony is that as a tall, beautiful size 14, “fat” is hardly a word you’d use to describe Ashlie. When she’d tell people the name of the play, they’d say, “’But you aren’t fat!’ ‘Oh, that’s awful, you’re not even…you know…’ They can’t say the word. But I felt like people who said that to me often missed the point. The title is not an accurate description of this woman. It doesn’t fit.”
Even stranger, Ashlie was not quite “fat” enough to play the part. She wore padding that made her appear to be a size 26. “All the parts I get called in for are fat. Most of the bigger parts, if they are romantic…size is designated. If it’s not romantic, I go in for anything. I get to play all these fat girls who get laid!”
In her new project for Showtime, “Filthy Gorgeous,” she’s in bed with a hot guy yet again. And in a new off-Broadway play, she’s playing Marilyn Monroe, with full nudity and a simulated sex scene. She has limited patience for skinny actresses who strap on fat suits (I won’t name names, but think Gwyneth Paltrow) to play parts.
“What really frustrates me is we have all these movies where people gain weight to play things – with all the fear of overweight -- and yet not the sort of comparable fear of people being too skinny. Why don’t they pay fat actors to lose weight?
Get Jack Black, or John C. Reilly, not that they’re fat but they’re real size. If you’re Christian Bale you can lose weight and go to the hospital.”
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